★tears for real? or for applause? ― Sayaka vents her (periodic?) irritation at cheap emotions★
Jaugo: Now that we are out of “love”, it’s time to sigh and shed tears. Are you ready to weep, Sayaka-san?
Sayaka: Is this our new theme of conversation ― tears?
Jaugo: “Lamentation”, to be exact.
Sayaka: All right, although it’s not my favorite topic.
Jaugo: Nobody likes to lament; that’s why they can’t help but vent their sadness in poems… or tears.
Sayaka: I remember what you said ― Autumn is the season most talked about in Heianese TANKA because it’s a sad season. Does that also apply to “sadness” in general? Are sad poems more numerous than happy ones?
Jaugo: Sadness and gladness are hard to distinguish from each other, as you can see in this poem. Just as hatred and love were hardly distinguishable in the last one.
Sayaka: I see.
Jaugo: Let’s see… wow! There are as many as 383 TANKA which include “涙（namida = tears）” in some 9,700 poems in 八代集（hachidaishuu = eight great Imperial TANKA anthologies）! That’s quite a lot, compared with 311 “桜（sakura = cherry blossom）”.
Sayaka: Why do they love to cry so much?
Jaugo: As I said, nobody likes to cry; they just can’t stand crying alone in their heart, so they cry aloud in poems to relieve their feelings… that’s the reason for the popularity of sadness and tears in TANKA.
Sayaka: (…) With all due respect, Jaugo-san, I somewhat doubt it.
Jaugo: Do you? I’m curious what makes you say so.
Sayaka: I feel there are too many “sad” songs, just as there are far too many “love” songs… both rather too many for me to believe in their truthfulness.
Jaugo: You say, quite a lot of “sad” songs or “love” songs around you sound unreal to you?
Sayaka: Don’t you feel so, Jaugo-san?
Jaugo: I know how you feel ― you feel those songs are motivated by something other than real human emotions, something impure and commercial, such as craving for applause or money?
Sayaka: You always hit the target in the bull’s eye, Jaugo-san.
Jaugo: Call me “Duke Jaugou（デューク冗郷）”, or Jarugo 13（ジャルゴ１３）.
Sayaka: What’s that?
Jaugo: …Forget it; I just succeeded in missing the target wide of the mark.
Sayaka: You sometimes sound intangible and lose me, but that doesn’t make me uncomfortable, maybe because I know you are consciously making it impossible for me to follow you… with complete success…
Jaugo: Thank you for your compliment.
Sayaka: Let me complement my speech ― I’m not trying to compliment you: what I was about to say was, most songs about “love” or “sadness” or any such cheaply popular emotions are simply lost on me and make me uncomfortable, simply because I know they are consciously trying to make me follow them, applaud them, pay money for them, feel happy or sad just the way they expect me to ― without any success. If they try to move me by such easy themes as “love” or “sadness”, they should do it more beautifully, like you do, Jaugo-san. In fact, most songs around sound so cheap and absurd to me that I feel almost indignant and shout out ― Hey, what do you take me for? A suggestible ape? A meek sheep? Don’t take me for granted! I’m a human being capable of really sad emotions, if not of real love as yet!
Jaugo: (…)
Sayaka: Sorry, I was being too hot ― am I losing you, Jaugo-san?
Jaugo: I’d guess you’re trying to get even with me for losing you by calling myself “Jarugo 13（ジャルゴ１３）”.
Sayaka: I’d guess this is one of my loony days. I sometimes just can’t help myself… monthly… you know what I mean?
Jaugo: I won’t assume innocence, though I ain’t no expert on such periodical ups and downs of your emotions… oh, that reminds me, is there something springing out from inside and tell you “Caution, Sayaka, your period is coming” even before the calendar tells you so?
Sayaka: (…)
Jaugo: Oh, I’m sorry if I’m being too indecently inquisitive; I was just wondering if the way tears surge up riding the tide of emotion may be not unlike the way your blood surges up and makes you more excitable than usual… sorry, just forget it, if you don’t like it.
Sayaka: I can’t answer with surgical accuracy, but I think you are not so fatally wide of the mark. I know it’s coming when it’s coming ― blood or tears. When I don’t feel it coming inside me, tears, cheers, a song, poem, sentence or person, is simply lost on me.
Jaugo: Does this particular TANKA makes you feel it coming inside you, Sayaka-san?
Sayaka: It does, as always ― you never fail to make me feel it coming, Jaugo-san.
Jaugo: Relieved to hear that; I feel almost excited to hear you say that… OK, don’t worry, Sayaka-san, I’d be the last one to take lewd advantage of your… blood fever. So, shall we finish earlier today?… it seems this is not your brightest day, nor is this poem a fit material for any more logical scrutiny.
Sayaka: I think so. Sorry for the embarrassment. I’ll come back normal next time.
Jaugo: Come back any time, normal or more than normal. You are always welcome, Sayaka-san. See you… and take care.
－－－－－－－－－－
２６）（題しらず）
よのなかのうきもつらきもつげなくにまづしるものはなみだなりけり
「世の中の憂きも辛きも告げなくに先づ知るものは涙なりけり」
『古今集』雑・九四一・よみ人しらず
『悲しいことや辛いことがあるたびに、「私は悲しい」・「私は辛い」と特に教えられたわけでもないのに、真っ先に出てきてはそうした気持ちをこの私に教えてくれる、不思議な先触れ役が、涙なんですよね・・・』
Even before I know how sad or painful it can be
Tears will let me know it’s time to sigh and weep.
よのなか【世の中】〔名〕＜NOUN:the world, life＞
の【の】〔格助〕＜POSTPOSITIONAL PARTICLE(POSSESSIVE):’s, of, belonging to＞
うし【憂し】〔形ク〕（うき＝連体形）＜ADJECTIVE:sad, gloomy, melancholic, lamentable＞
も【も】〔係助〕＜POSTPOSITIONAL PARTICLE(OBJECT)＞
つらし【辛し】〔形ク〕（つらき＝連体形）＜ADJECTIVE:harsh, painful, hard＞
も【も】〔係助〕＜POSTPOSITIONAL PARTICLE(OBJECT)＞
…what’s sad and painful in life
つぐ【告ぐ】〔他ガ下二〕（つげ＝未然形）＜VERB:inform, tell, teach＞
ず【ず】〔助動特殊型〕打消（な＝未然形）＜AUXILIARY VERB(NEGATIVE):not＞
く【く】〔接尾〕＜MODAL＞
に【に】〔接助〕＜POSTPOSITIONAL PARTICLE(CONCESSION):although, and yet＞
…without being told [by me]
まづ【先づ】〔副〕＜ADVERB:first of all, at first＞
しる【知る】〔他ラ四〕（しる＝連体形）＜VERB:know, find＞
もの【物】〔名〕＜NOUN:a thing＞
は【は】〔係助〕＜POSTPOSITIONAL PARTICLE(SUBJECT)＞
なみだ【涙】〔名〕＜NOUN:tears＞
なり【なり】〔助動ナリ型〕断定（なり＝連用形）＜AUXILIARY VERB:be＞
けり【けり】〔助動ラ変型〕過去（けり＝終止形）＜AUXILIARY VERB(DISCOVERY):I found out＞
…tears are the first one to know they’re coming
《yononaka no uki mo tsuraki mo tsuge naku ni mazu shiru mono wa namida nari keri》
■tears ― this strange harbinger of emotions■
They come when it’s time to come. Do we cry because we are sad, or are we sad because we cry? ― ours is not to reason why ― we just follow them, since they are the quickest and surest cue for sadness, even gladness ― tears ― when you feel them coming, don’t think: FEEL… and cry…
《うきせにもうれしきせにもさきにたつ なみだはおなじなみだなりけり：uki se ni mo ureshiki se ni mo saki ni tatsu namida wa onaji namida narikeri》『千載集（Senzai-shuu）』雑（Miscellany） No.1117 by 藤原顕方（Fujiwara-no-Akikata）憂き瀬にも(in sadness)嬉しき瀬にも(as well as in gladness)先に立つ(they are the first to feel and tell)涙は(tears)同じ涙なりけり(from the same spring with different tastes)
We provide you not with actual conversation partners, but we enable you to engage in intellectually enticing conversation with Sayaka-san/Jaugo-san(…no mean feat, isn’t it?)
WEB lessons by ZUBARAIE LLC. are currently for JAPANESE students only, conducted in Japanese language (…sorry for English speakers)